"I Love You Sydney" posted by ---2---
I do not know what I am writing here or how long it will be. I just feel like there is so much that I need to tell the world. This is dedicated to my little love Sydney. Sydney, you have taught me so much. Everyday I grow with you. We will continue to grow together and teach each other everything that we need to know.
How can one express the joy of holding your love in your arms? She was brought home to me on Christmas eve.
I held you then, you were wrapped in that little pink blanket. I looked deep into your eyes as you embraced my warmth. Looked deep into your soul and saw nothing other then pure love. Never will I forget that moment where I first held you, my love. It lasted but a few seconds and will forever be etched upon my heart.
The day wore on. You began to discover the house that was your new home. Started to run around and get into trouble as all little pups do. But it was also on that day that we discovered that you were blind. We feared for you then. In our ignorance of the facts. Feared what kind of life you would have. But I made a promise to you that day, my love. I promised that I would stay with you. Promised that you would stay with me. Promised that I would never turn my back on you.
Time moved on and our bond began to tighten. You were afraid. You could not trust. It was clear that you had been through to much. But I remained. There by your side. Helping you with all the challenges that you faced. Together we learned. Together we discovered a new world. Together we still do.
You learned how to walk down the stairs. One challenge that had caused you so much pain. But not any longer. You learned how to con people into giving you a little treat from there plate. I guess that Bear taught you that because I do not remember doing so.
Times were difficult for us, my love. You did not trust me or any other human for that matter. You could not see what my heart had to offer. You did not understand that some humans were good. Your past kept reflecting into the present and you were unable to see who I am. Many times you bit me my love. Many times you made me bleed. But I stood by your side. As your aggression got worse I began to become scared for you, my love. Scared but even more determined to never leave you.
Times became even more difficult for us my love. On that cold Tuesday night in March. I rushed home from work to be with you. You had a seizure that night, my love. We took you to the vet, afraid for you. But you were brave my love. Never once did you falter. We were sent home with you, my love. Told to come back for blood tests on Thursday.
Thursday came, my love. I was afraid for you once more. But agian you were brave. We dropped you off in the early morning and I cried as I walked out the door and went to work. All day at work I worried about my love. When I phoned the doctor at work he assured me that you were alright. I left work and came to you. I was early but it hurt to be without you.
The test results came in just before I got there. You were to happy to be let out of the pen to be worried about anything else. The results were bad, my love. I cryed many tears. My thoughts turned to many dark places for shelter, my love. But you were there with me. I told myself once more that you would always be there with me, my love. Never would I give up on you.
Some time later you started to sleep in my bed with me. I do not know whether or not you sensed my sadness, but you comforted me in those lonely teary nights. Together we slept. My hand holding your tiny paw. Together we slept. Side by side.
One night you were laying beside me. I had turned off the computer and was heading off to bed It was very late, my love. I was about to turn off the light when you looked up at me. You reached your tiny paw up and reached my face. you held your tiny little paw on my face. I laughed not knowing what you were doing. You then got up and licked my face. Then lay back down beside me. I cried. Tears of joy I shed all night.
Two weeks passed and we had to bring you back into see the vet. More tests were needed. Again I had to bring you back there. I feared wasting any moments of time without you. I did not want what little time we had left to be spent apart. We were allowed to go home together that day, my love. We drew some blood from you and then we were allowed to leave together. Together we came home. I do not know what thoughts dwelled within your mind, but I know that my mind was clouded with what the future inevitably held.
The call came in at about 5. All day I sat by the phone waiting for it to ring. My nerves could no longer handle it. The doctor was on the other line. He told me, my love. He told me that you were ok. He told me that there was nothing wrong with you. He told me that the previous tests had come back wrong for a list of reasons. You were ok my love. It was a miracle. You future was given back to you. Given back to us. We spent the whole night together, my love.
Time went on and you started to draw away from me once again, my love. Again your agression got worse. You bit me, made me bleed. But again I promised to stay with you. I knew that one day you would trust me. You learned so many things. Finally learned that the toilet is outside. You learned all but how to trust. Your blindness as well as your past kept you from trusting me.
I made a new promise to you, my love. I promised that our new time together would not be wasted. I hope that I have kept that promise to you, my love. Training you has been difficult, my love. You will not let me put a leash on you. You try to attack me. But I remain there by your side. Never could I let go. I know that you will learn one day to trust, my love. One day you will see in me all there is. One day you will learn how to love me, as much as I have learned how to love you.
That day has come my love. You have learned, my love. Love has shown you how things can be. You trust me now, my love. You let me hold you, hug you, kiss you and never let you go. The rays of love have shown through to you. No longer do you try to bite me. No longer do you show aggression to me. For you trust me now, my love. When you come running to me as I walk in the door, my love I know. I know that you trust me now.
I make a new promise to you, my love. I promise that I will never let you lose that gift which you have given me. I will never let you lose that which you have seen within me. The trust will never be lost. That I promise you, my love.
Tears well up in my eye as I write this to you my love. I know that you understand me. For we understand one another. The barrier of species and language do not apply to us, my love. When Love rules, nothing else matters. Love is the only thing that we must understand. We both understand it well now, my love.
I love you Sydney.
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